stories from a subway involving ham: part 1

Earlier today, I went to subway for lunch, as I often do. When I got there, there was this really confused woman in line who apparently has never been to a subway in her life.

She seemed kind of old-lady-nuts.

She ordered a cold cut combo, which is bologna, ham and salami. And then she asked for it without the ham.

So, the Indian lady behind the counter said, "It all contains ham."
And so the crazy old lady said that she has dietary restrictions, and she can't have ham.

Subway Indian lady said that it all has ham, again.
And the old crazy lady asks them to take the ham out.
So Subway Indian lady says that the ham is cooked in.

And this goes round and round about 6 more times, and then the old lady starts to get mad, and starts shouting.

So the indian lady holds up the cold cut combo meat pack and yells, "TELL ME WHERE TO TAKE THE HAM OUT?!?!"

And then the other subway indian lady steps in and starts naming other things that have no ham in them.

"Why don't you get chicken? There's no ham in chicken."

And clearly the old lady doesn't understand a single thing going on, and just keeps shouting that she doesn't understand why they can't give her it without ham.

So, finally, I decided that my assistance is needed, and I said to her, "You know, bologna and salami both have ham in them. That's why they can't take out the ham, because it's all ham, in a way."

And she said, "Oh." And then ordered the chicken.

I love Chicago.